Tuesday, July 04, 2006

A (not so) funny thing happened...

...as I walked the dog the other night. As we do every day. In our very own suburbia laden neighbourhood.

I noticed about 3 houses ahead, an older lady struggling with her garbage can. I said, "Self, when we get there, I'll offer to help her with that." As we approached, my dog, er, um, well, shit relieved herself just shy of her property line. I promptly cleaned it up as we always do, and always have with every single shit since the very first day we had her. Then I stood up, about to offer said help, only to receive,

BOL: Keep your dog off our property!

moi: (almost singing and nicely) I cleaned it all up

BOL: Don't let your dog touch our property

moi: I always clean it up after my dog

BOL: but then they leave their stink for other dogs and animals, i have a dog too. just stay off our property

moi: (in high falooting bitch mode now) actually, this isn't your property, as the first 4-6 feet actually belong to the city. what do you do when you walk your dog?

BOL: I don't walk my dog

moi: well, I believe a dog should be walked

BOL: just stay off or I'll report you

moi: report me for walking my licensed, leashed dog after which i cleaned up? go ahead (walking away)


and I walked away.

I was laughing out loud. Out LOUD. and I think that pissed her off too. I walked to the end of the street, about 10 houses, turned to look before crossing the street and there she is at the end of her driveway, standing there, arms crossed, trying to intimidate me? Whatever.

I waved, blew her a kiss and crossed the street. (Hubby says that was being a little too sassy, but it was kinda fun)

What did I want to do? Not only go back, offer her my name, address and phone number and look forward to getting 'reported' but to blare at her "DO YOU THINK I FUCKING CARE ABOUT MY DOG PISSING ON YOUR LAWN 48 HOURS AFTER MY SON HAD LIFE ALTERING SURGERY?"

Oh ya. About that.

Last Wednesday night Trevor had a sleep study, we suspected some form of sleep apnea. A home study where we attached the probe (a.k.a. laser toe) to his foot, attach wire to portable recording machine thingy, return machine next morning for lab/docs to review results. Hubby dropped the machine of at 10 AM. By 11 AM they were calling us, he needed to be admitted. Now.

His results were staggering. Category 4. The worst on their scale. Hospital protocol in such cases, immediate admission and corrective surgery within 72 hours.

Where were we thursday morning? At the pool, doing lessons, jr. jr. swim team, the boys went ot the park with a pre-teen, I stayed in the pool for Aquasize. I get out, someone says "Your phone has been ringing a lot" I check it, 8 missed calls. I haven't had 8 calls in the last 3 months! It rings again. That was noon. By 3 PM we are on our way to the Children's Hospital.

Long story short, after some routine pre-op tests, the no food/drink rule started at midnite, and at 8 PM Friday night he was called to the OR. A quick surgery to remove both adenoids and tonsils that were "unbelievably huge for a child that size", followed by 24 hours in the ICU (again another policy for category 4), we came home.

Phew. It's done. We always suspected this would be the case, but never to such severity, and not quite in the fast-action fashion it happened. We were more than happy to follow referral after referral and take our place in line to take care of things.

The 'severity' in this case is that there are risks in a category 4 as scary as oxygen deprived brain damage, and even fatality. We weren't given any odds or percentages, just the 'risks', which defines the reason for their policy.

Now at home, we have a Tylenol junkie who know sounds like he's been sucking on helium.

I learned so much from our experience, as traumatic as it may seem to our cushy little lives, there is oh, so much more going on out there. No comparison to what some go through, but I'm saving that for another day. Till then, I need to go cuddle my little munchkin (his voice sounds just like the ones from Oz) cause he says he isn't "feeling really well" cause his ankle hurts. Go figure.

Then maybe we'll go for a dog walk...heh heh heh.


Blogger DaniGirl said...

See, this is why I admire you so much. (Well, this and about a thousand other reasons.) Because I would have been bawling by the end of the encounter with Madame Bitchy Lawn, on top of everything else. Your reaction is so much more a propos!

I'm glad your little one is feeling better - man, what a week! Give his 'ankle' a kiss from all of us...

12:45 PM EDT  
Blogger Silver Creek Mom said...

I'm with Dani... ON Everything. I would have bawled too and told her to F*ck off.

And T was a trooper....He needs another ice cream.


12:59 PM EDT  
Anonymous Beanie Baby said...

Good for you. Next time, go back with some sidewalk chalk and decorate the city's portion in front of her house, eh?

There was someone in my last neighbourhood who always went and spraypainted "NO PARKING" on teh curb in front of his house. Buddy, it's not your curb; that's vandalism and you can't tell other people where to park.

I'm glad to hear your boy is ok. That must have been scary. I hope his "ankle" is feeling better.

2:52 PM EDT  
Anonymous Naomi said...

Good for you to speak up to the neighbour. It's sad how you can try/intend to be nice, and some people are just supreme jerks.

Scary story about your boy...glad he's okay!

9:19 PM EDT  
Blogger BeachMama said...

Well, I would have had a few choice words for the neighbour. Since I have two monstrosities of dogs and I pick up if one (the husky) poops in public, I can totally sympathise with you. I would definately be letting them pee on her lawn if it were me (I don't let them pee in public).

As for your special little boy. He is in our thoughts and we are so happy that everything went smoothly and that he is home now, munchkin voice and all. Hope his ankle recovers quickly and he will be back to his old self in no time at all.

6:28 AM EDT  
Blogger SRH said...

Sorry to hear about the surgery. I hope all is better now.

8:48 AM EDT  
Blogger twinmomplusone said...

Loved how you crossed the street, waved and blew her a kiss! Love it! That's teh way to deal with b*tchy old f*arts!!!

Relieved to hear all went so well for your precious munchkin. It's in moments like this, when faced with health issues, that our perspective on life alters. Wishing him a speedy recovery and lots of ice cream and jello.

hugs to all

9:30 AM EDT  
Blogger moe said...

What a sad old lady. I would still have offered to help with her garbage. When people are nasty to me I try to be extra nice back. I figure that's the best way to make them realize they are sh*ts.

Glad to hear all is well with your son. You are probably lucky it happened so fast. It didn't give you much time to worry.

5:34 PM EDT  
Blogger gnightgirl said...

Ya gotta wonder what people bother to sweat over, don't you?

The emergency surgery sounds very traumatic, but I'm so glad your son is ok! Hope he's feeling better now.

9:47 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow! I'm sorry Trevor's test results and surgery were so dramatic. And I'm heartily glad it all went smoothly and is all done. It will be interesting to see what kinds of changes you might notice in the next few weeks, in his sleep and in his moods and overall health. Way to go Trevor! And way to go Nancy and all of you for coping so well with the stress.
Hope the rest of the summer is ordinary and happy!

11:16 PM EDT  
Blogger Chantal said...

Holy cow! Scary circumstances.

Our now 8 year old had the same problem and what a huge difference it made. Her mood improved. Her concentration improved. She SLEPT for the first time in 6 years!

The high voice was an interesting side effect. I'm embarassed to say how annoying it was. LOL

9:35 PM EDT  
Anonymous Kyle Korleski said...

Hah! Reading that story about that old bag made Pepsi shoot out my nose (had to get a towel to wipe it off my keyboard). You truly handled it like I would have (or possibly better).

6:02 PM EDT  
Blogger halloweenlover said...

So glad your baby is okay! That is really scary!

I did laugh quite a bit about the dog thing, though. You are so bad, blowing her a kiss! She must have been fuming! Really, though, what a freak!

7:50 PM EDT  

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