Wednesday, November 30, 2005
I have so much on my plate this week with my volunteer stuff I have been neglecting my blogging buddies - I apologize. BUT...soon Frances, the WBBE, BN will pick our names for the Winter Holiday of Your Choice Extravaganza thingy. I can't wait!!
Recharge??? Charge it!!! I also have a sitter coming on Friday night so I can attend an adults only Christmas dinner thingy for our Co-Op Playgroup.
We're gonna make it!! I think, I hope, I'm melting....5. More. Long. Sleeps.
P.S. Heathrow shopping list ideas most welcome.
Thursday, November 24, 2005
Today was a good day, we were kept quite busy with trips to the post office, gym'n'swim lessons, and yup...snow. We had a rather good dose of it today, maybe 5-10 cm (approx. 2-4 inches for the Americans - HAPPY THANKSGIVING!). When my Beloved called on my cellphone around 3 PM our time to tell me he was there safely, I asked him what the weather was like there. He replied "Around 25" (Note: that's Celsius, again around 80 Fahrenheit) and I blurted back "Wow! You got more than we did!" Me, referring to snow accumulation, him, more referring to the level of SPF he'll be needing. Har dee har har, I so funny.
So, he is here:
Looking out his fucking window at this:
SO I emailed him this pic of his very precious car...
...and told him to bite me.
The good news is that I grabbed a peak at his itinerary and noticed he did not have a 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 or 8 hour layover in Heathrow on his way home, but 9. NINE glorious hours of shopping at Heathrow. I told him I was making a wish list to send him and he is not to return without it duly completed. I was just kidding of course, but there are Duty Free shops there, that sell Swatch watches, and there is one I have been eyeballing for months. AND AND AND (trying to catch my breath) there is a (pant pant pant) Disney Store there!! Buzz is HUGE in the U.K. and the obsession for Buzz in this house is just as huge, only exponentially squared a thousand times more. I did spend a small fortune at the Ottawa store a couple of weeks ago, but there is always room for more more more. If only the budget had room for a pink Burberry scarf...sigh.
Hey, do you like my boots?
There is someone out there who always bugs me about my boots. They are circa 1991 Sorels purchased in Edmonton where the winters are oooh, so nipply cold and in the early 90's white was in. They still keep my feet warm so why should I go buy new ones just to match?? That is way too fashionista for me, I'd rather save my pennies to match in the handbag or shoe department (plus the last time I checked Winners doesn't sell apple red Sorels in my size).
P.S. Did you know in the Blogger spellcheck (yes Sharon, it does exist) that the suggested correct spelling for fashionista is pessimists. Go figure.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Hello? Wonder Woman? Can I borrow your underwear?
Let's see, last time he went away for a 'long' trip (classification longer than 5 days) twin B bumped his head and required medical attention in the form of one stitch. That was Day 1. It was healed and removed by the time Daddy got home.
This time I am willing all potential medical attention needing situations AWAY. Done. Next, we will have our usual crazy schedule of preschool, library, swim'n'gym, skating, Sunday School, playdates, errands, yadda yadda yadda. And as much as we are capable of doing everything ourselves, it just really truly makes my life so much happier/easier when my Beloved is home. Just the mental relief knowing he is in the same city as us is sometimes enough to keep me sane. The errands and groceries will be done more sporadically and with assistance. Thank God for my personal shopper (Gramps) who like any retired senior citizen, hits the grocery store &/or Zellers almost daily.
The 'thing' is, yes there is a 'thing'. We are hosting our annual big-ass Open House Holiday party thingamajig on the 10th. He gets home late on the 4th. HIS staff Christmas shindig is on the 9th, and get this, NO SPOUSES invited this year. WTF is up with that? So, the 'thing' is that between now and then, I have to do EVERYTHING in prep for the party, all on top of normal life which tends to fill my time up rather nicely. Kinda like squeezing in that extra cherry on the whipped cream infested triple layer chocolate fudge sundae, even though there really is no more room for it. (see? Trying to be semi-optimistic?)
I'll do the shopping, the baking, the cleaning, the decorating, the more shopping, the more baking, and of course, the more decorating etc etc etc. If you are reading this and are one of my neighbours or my husband's co-workers, please don't be too disappointed when all we serve this year is, well....nothing. OK, I am kidding cause I LOVE hosting this party every year, just the prep is gonna be a little, different. It won't be as much fun as it usually is. We have already purchased all the wine. We were in Ottawa a couple of weeks ago cause, hello, the booze is so much cheaper across the border in Canada (unlike the country of Quebec). We just always have so much fun putting everything together, together. I like being together. Ah well, perhaps I can put a few new signature items on the list, you know, since I'll have to make all the really important decisions alone. Please add martini injected olives and the Bailey's martini. Seeing a theme here???
Stay tuned, and if you are willing, please hold my hand. Thank you.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Getting To Know Me Questionnaire for The Winter Holiday of Your Choice Blog Bonanza
Here are my answers to Marla's questionnaire for the Blogging Holiday Gifty Extravaganza Thingy. Holy shit - this was harder than applying for a passport. It will be worth it though, cause I am thinking I am pretty much guaranteed that something fun will appear one day in my mailbox. Doesn't get much better than that, does it?
Fill in the blanks:
If I could get away with it, I'd steal the key to Tiffany’s NYC, because damn it, it should be mine.
I sometimes buy celeb gossip magazines, because I lust after gossip.
If you came over to my house to play and broke my red wine crayon, I'd be a little bit mad at you forever.
The colour shit brown, shit green, shit mustard yellow, anything that resembles shit should only be used in fungal remedy packaging or if human waste were to be redesigned.
The colour PINK makes my heart feel like it is full of happy kittens frolicking in a sunny, grassy meadow.
Thong underwear makes me break out in gooberous pustules (or else I just don't like it, but I'm too nice to say it.)
I might get sick or die if I touch wool (the itchy stuff) or ingest tequila, or look at Ozzy Osbourne.
Spiders, bees and wasps give me the heebie jeebies and I might need to seek therapy if I even think about it further.
I love the feel of flannel so much I have a primitive urge to stick some down my pants. (you don’t know how hard it was for me to NOT type vibrator).
No one should have to watch me eat spicy hot chicken wings, because really If I were eating some in private, I'd be quite a pig about it.
I would rather chew tinfoil and shave my head with a cheese grater than eat brussel sprouts &/or strawberries.
I DO/DON’T follow recipes because I am so not like Martha in any way.
For Marla, "White Shoulders" perfume will always smell like her laid-out dead grandmother. I feel that way about I am so sorry, blaming over-tired twin-mommy brain drain on this one but I just do not understand this one.
If I could, I'd perfume my own farts and those of my loved ones with the scent of lily of the valley.
I have TOO MANY/TOO MUCH OF pens, and not enough pens. (may I also add snowman decorations, lip gloss and candles)
Gadgets are for fun.
When people have kind, sweet and nice things about me, they're usually talking about my commitment to my children.
I can't be upset if people dis me about my brutally honest, candid and overly opinionated opinions, because it's true.
If I could have any talent in the world, I'd choose to be Wonder Woman and use it to survive when DH is out of town (that, and save the world from all perils and unfortunate conditions).
You are given an hour and twenty dollars to spend in one of these places, childfree. Choose one, or write your own:
A flea market, where you might find neat treasures and still have enough left over for some home made baked goods from that nice granny's table.
A picturesque pub, where a couple of great drinks and a nice tip might lead to some interesting conversations.
A craft show, because you really need to find a few more things made from twigs and yarn.
A gourmet food store, because food for the tummy is food for the soul.
A fancy and expensive boutique, because you'd rather have one lipstick from a great place than ten lipsticks from a dollar store.
Wherever! Whatever! Just give the twenty dollars to whomever's caring for the offspring so you can have more time to yourself!
And here's the last chance to make sure that you're not going to get a "Jelly of the Month" club membership when you're expecting your bonus for a swimming pool:It is important to me that the items chosen for me are FUN FUN FUN. (Examples: respect my Wal-Mart boycott, are vegan, aren't made by child or sweatshop labour, can be stuffed down my pants)
And If I could suggest that you read only one post from my archives, this would be it: this one or this one. No wait this one. (Sorry, I know I am cheating. Deal with it.)
AndIf I were to name the Holiday of my choice for this exchange, it would be: FESTIVUS (yes, à la Seinfeld)
(Please feel free to make one up - but this is your chance to say "Um, I'm Jewish but that doesn't mean give me dreidels!" or "More Santa decorations please - I only have thirty-seven now." or "Winter and gifts yes; religious denominations, no - if only all cards could be like those politically correct corporate holiday wishes!" if you want to.)
Monday, November 21, 2005
Not a Twinkie,
And no, the witch is not dead. (but I have to believe there are days my husband wishes it was so)
I am quickly becoming rather particular to door-to-door solicitors. Before we were established with our own home and our own kidlets, it was easy to turn everyone away. Yes, everyone, even the Girl Guide cookies (but only when we didn't even have $4 in pennies laying around). But now with our own children, knowing that one day they too will be carousing the neighbourhood selling oranges, chocolates, soaps and asking for sponsorship for swim-a-thons, skate-a-thons, Terry Fox runs, etc....how can I say no?
Here are the current guidelines being followed when the doorbell rings:
(1) If it is Gramps, let him in.
(2) Friends, let them in.
(3) The mailman, greet him nicely, he may have a parcel in the mail for you.
(4) Anyone from a religious background other than ours? Close the door - VERY quickly. Claim you are in the middle of washing your hair, even if you are fully clothed and not dripping wet.
(5) If person is of high school age or younger, selling anything, buy it (except sex, that would be bad).
(6) If person is raising funds for your sports team/club or field trip - pay them.
(7) If there are little girls selling cookies, buy however much you can with however much $$ you can find in entire house including childrens' piggy banks. Then ask them to return the next day cause all 13 boxes will be empty.
I have only ever questioned a child twice. Both times I was a little skeptic. Now I know it sounds absolutely horrible grilling a 9 year old boy on the validity of his photocopied, filled in the blanks sponsor form that has been folded and re-folded many times which appeared from his pocket when I opened the door, and being the very first one on the list. The school is not in our area, he claims his elderly aunt lives around the corner. As hard as it was for me, I did not sponsor him telling him I had already sponsored many kids from the schools in our neighbourhood. In hindsight, I made the right decision.
I have recently committed to volunteering for the Missing Children's Network. An former teacher and dear friend of mine, recently retired is planning on cycling across Canada next summer in hopes of reaching his goal of raising $100 000 for the MCN. (This is not the last you'll hear/read about this one, we are just getting started). He asked me to be on his working committee. I am thrilled. He is in the process of trying to get schools across the country involved. We have learned that all charities SHOULD (not mandatory) but in order to ensure the validity of the charity and the event, all sponsor forms should be those duplicate/triplicate forms, and not just a photocopy. This is likely for official, registered charities and not necessarily for the band's trip to Alaska. Anyway, it got me thinking about who we sponsor/donate to and how often frequently.
I used to shake my head at my Beloved who would gladly hand over whatever he had, and now? Not so much...
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Can yuo raed tihs?
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
Can yuo raed tihs?
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Check it out...
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
The one benefit to the children realizing that Christmas is slowly becoming a reality is the 'warning' of Santa watching who is good or bad really and truly works wonders as a behaviour modification tool. In fact I overheard B telling A he better not cry or else Santa won't bring him a robot. I just wonder WTF I am gonna do once Christmas has come and gone, I don't figure the Easter Bunny has the same effect as the great man in red.
40 MORE SLEEPS!!!
Friday, November 11, 2005
"Thank you for keeping our country safe."
'Nuff said. But I just have to add that every time we see a display set up where they are accepting donations, handing out poppies, he goes right over and says the same thing to whoever is manning the booth.
"Thank you for keeping our country safe."
Whoever said they were too young...
Thursday, November 10, 2005
DeeVeeDees BUG me
Now get this, from what I hear, as of Januray 1, 2007 the manufacturing of blank VHS tapes will cease to exist. Some retailers have already started to clear them out and discontinue selling them. Er, Um, hello you MORONS, how the hell am I going to tape all of my favourite shows and watch them when (1) I have time and (2) at 25% less time it takes to watch the actual aired show cause I can fast forward the commercials. This potential travesty already has me in near hysterics. I suppose 'THEY' (who control the universe) want me to spend a shitload of cash on some new & improved machine so I can tape onto a DVD?? Or do we have to spend another small fortune on some digital cable box with a PVR. How the F is a little person in sociely like me supposed to be able to keep up? Holy heck, we just barely managed to get a DVD player in recent months.
The OTHER thing that has me burning, is while watching a DVD, a movie, settling in on couch cuddling with my Beloved sharing a warm bucket of popcorn and my tasty Diet Coke and the fucking thing just ........ keeps ......sto-pp---ing and
and paus----ing---o---ver---and---o----ver and then the sound disappears while the--- movie
Oh dear, is there a tiny fleck of a dust mite on it? 1/800 th of a finger print?? I am NOT talking about those from the library or rental place that have been viewed hundreds of time, I am simply talking about the ones I borrow from my father that have been viewed once, perhaps twice at the most. WTF?????? I don't ever recall missing key moments in any movie while watching it on tape. N-E-V-E-R. Sure there was always the occasional tracking problem, ten year ago fixed by turning a knob or pushing a button and more recently the machine adjusting itself. That. Is. All. Whoever said technology was so grand??? I could go on about how the hell did we all survive without something as primitive as our cordless phones, NOT even referring to the cell phones, but I'll save that one for another time.
For now, I'll continue to watch my shows on TAPE until I can no longer by a VCR at a garage sale since there won't be any available in the stores. And then when there are no more left on the planet, I'll go back in time and live off the earth itself. I think even 'They' did that way back when.
Monday, November 07, 2005
My brain is happily void.
So, I'll head on over to eBay, sell some things, make some money, use it to buy a bottle of wine, drink it up, come back and then maybe I'll have something amusing to say.
Till next time, humour me, go to the sidebar over there ----------> (go DOWN a bit more you silly goose) and click on guest map and SIGN THE DAMN THING. I have the most pathetically attended Guest Map in the blogosphere, very embarrassing actually. So can I please BEG you to click on it and place your pin? Use a fake name if you want, I don't care, pretend you live in Qatar, I don't care...just SIGN IT! (pul-eeze?)
Friday, November 04, 2005
Fertile vs Infertile : The Parenting Style
I do think I am a good parent, but I also know at many times, I am not. Not proud of myself, nor my actions. I lose my patience, get extremely frustrated and sometimes just downright pissed off mad AT them. (yes, you heard me correctly) Gasp! The horrors!! Do I occasionally yell at my kids? Yes, I do. There are some days where I feel that’s been our only form of communication. Rest assured that isn’t the case, but it sure can feel that way. Those days are the worst. They suck. Am I proud of myself? No, it bites.
When I see other parents who are so tolerant, so patient, oh so Mrs. Cleaver with their little ones, I get jealous I don’t seem to share those same coping mechanisms. I have always been the Type A who speaks her mind, all the time, usually in a rather brutally honest way which often gets me into trouble. If dealing with other adults, so be it, they can deal. If dealing with my children, I get nauseated from the guilt, always after the fact of course. Is that little extra amount of guilt I am feeling correlated to the fact that arriving to my ultimate dream of being a Mommy took just that little, no wait, A LOT of extra work to arrive to said dream?
I don’t believe I would have a different parenting style had my offspring occurred due to some horizontal aerobics, but I do wonder if it *should* be. All that extra heartache, tears, emotions, the angst ridden challenges in every facet including financial, mental and physiological…and folks, that’s NOT normal, nor fair when all you really want is to be a parent. I often wonder when I am post-losing-it at my kids, if it was truly warranted. I often say to myself, “Come on already lady, they are only three. Get over it.” Which is followed with gut wrenching feelings of regret while wondering why I am not a softy-tofty towards them because it was simply so hard to have them. We are ‘strict’ in the area of manners and learning right from wrong. And for those wondering, yes of course we bend the rules, we are well aware that you have to pick your battles, and we do. Holy verbal diarrhea, am I making any sense here?
Please don’t be scared, I am not in need of any anger management therapy. I do wish I was more of the laissez-faire mindset when it came down to the smaller things. Any hints? Three deep breaths? Meditative yoga? A mantra (“the water is rolling off my back”)? Feng shui? Booze? I’ll try to sing Doris Day a little more often “Que Sera Sera…”
I do wonder if some other infertile parents out there feel a little more aware of their disciplining than the ‘other team’. I think an interesting perspective may come from those of you who have children from both AR, adoption and/or au naturel. Maybe I just feel bad. B-A-D when I am upset with my kids. After all, they are here, they are mine and they are only three.