Friday, April 13, 2007

take one and call me....

I was all ambitious in making an attempt to write this great big fancy-ass post with the most brilliant and humorous of punchlines, but alas, not gonna happen.

I am a recently 40 years old. I am an infertile. I have only been pregnant once. This after many attempts of drug induced manipulation to increase our fertility, and finally having the moment that means it all, which usually happens with candle light, wine, and Astroglide, happen in a petrie dish thanx to some guy I've never met.

In recent months, I have been having some issues with my plumbing department, one of them being severe bleeding and blood clots. We aren't talking about a paper cut here. It's more like someone opening a fire hydrant of blood from within my uterus. Remember how much I love my uterus?

There seem to be some medical options out there that may be able to help me. This week I met with a new gynecologist for the first time. He was terrific (and I have a funny story about that for another day). He spends a good 45 minutes with me asking all sorts of info, examining me, etc. It was very thorough. I will mention I had previously done bloodwork and u/s as work-up for this appointment. He has a plan for me, and the immediate, quickest way to help me for the next 4-6 months is a pill. A magic little pill. Yup. The Pill.

The Pill.

I am 40 years old. We have not had protected sex in 8 years. We are infertile. Our family is complete. And I am on THE PILL.

Maybe I could at least get drafted as one of those hotties in the commercials, you know, with the sexy, silky voice announcing to millions in North America "I am on Alesse". I'll show them my flabby tummy and stretch marks at the same time. That'll screw everyone up good. LOL.

The really hard part is knowing that now there really is absolutely no chance of even dreaming, hoping, praying, wishing, fantasizing about that eensy weensy teensy iota of a chance for that miracle natural pregnancy. Really hard.


Blogger Marla said...

I'm sorry your uterus is such an asshole.

12:36 PM EDT  
Blogger Gnightgirl said...

Stupid uteri. I'm 44 and on that pill too, for the same reason, to control that crazy flow. It can drive you mad, MAD, I tell you; you have my utmost sympathy...and the pill really seems to do the trick.

Don't ever, EVER consider depo-provera, as a solution for this, unless you talk to me first. That's my advice, and I am no one.

12:59 PM EDT  
Blogger Amsterdam Mom said...

Little Nance,

I'm so sorry to hear about this. As someone else who enjoys unprotected sex with an 99.9% guarantee of never reproducing again, I can sympathize. Sometimes it is that iota that reminds you how good hope is.

3:25 PM EDT  
Blogger Elle said...

I'm really sorry Nancy. I feel ya here, there is no bigger a PITA than wanting to be pregnant, and it's such a struggle. Plus being on the pill again - what a kick.

I wish I could say something to make you feel better.

12:34 PM EDT  
Blogger BeachMama said...

I feel your pain. Even though now we have a 0% chance of ever conceiving naturally, I still flinched when they gave me the pill for the ivf.

And every month before that since my surgery, I had a really hard time getting past the fact that there won't ever be a reason to buy hpt's again. Or that I will never have a surprise pregnancy again.

Some things in life just truly aren't fair.

I do hope it helps in the meantime though.

2:19 PM EDT  
Blogger DaniGirl said...

Oh Nancy - I don't even know what to say. The final, ironic insult... and it's not even remotely funny. I'm so sorry that your uterus continues to be such a tool.

10:03 AM EDT  
Blogger Zany Mama said...

Having to take the pill is like adding insult to injury.

I'm sorry your uterus is such a fool.
Stupid uterus.

12:17 PM EDT  
Blogger Silver Creek Mom said...


Damn our interal organs.

2:22 PM EDT  
Anonymous valerie said...

I've been trying to think what to say other than my first reaction - how ironic and it sucks. I hope the pill treats you better than it does me. Hugs,

10:38 AM EDT  

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