Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Dear Internet,

I need your help. Please. Please find someone who has either already invented, or can invent and patent so I can BUY a gizmo that will enable me to reach the skin lotion to that one 3 inch area in the middle of my back. My skin is so dry and the kids no longer wanna get that 'stuff' on their hands. That one spot that is oh, so close, yet so disheartingly far away and impossible to reach. It is truly the bane of my existence these days. (wel, that and the fact that the Canadian Men's hockey team can't score a freaking goal) You think I need a life? Or what?

Don't suggest a husband with a normal schedule or no traveling cause that's not gonna happen.

Send me links!! Ebay?? Anything! Or hire your sister-in-laws cuzzin Vinny to invent something for me.

Pul-eeze. I am not afraid to beg, and that may not be pretty.


Blogger Silver Creek Mom said...

Dear Nancy

This is the internet replying. AS I agree with you that the Canadian Mens hockey team needs to kick some Hockey Butt, I don't know if I can help you in that other department. All I can say is get one of those long handled loofah sponges and cover it with a tight cloth add lotion and rub. If you do decide to patent this one I want half.


Or hire Nathan he LOVES to put cream on Mommy's back!

hugs Sharon...I mean the NET!

9:14 AM EST  
Blogger BeachMama said...

I'll rack my brain and see what I can come up with ;)

And yes, I too am sadly disappointed in our Men's team, they are really not doing very well :(


11:19 AM EST  
Blogger DaniGirl said...

Is it worth the four hour drive? Cuz I'm not afraid of a little cream!

Otherwise, maybe squirt some onto the kitchen counter, then lie on it(envision a dog in the grass, if you will)? Apply it with a spatula? Squirt it over your shoulder and hope gravity will lend a hand (figuratively speaking)?

1:10 PM EST  
Anonymous Barb said...

Invite Gramps for supper...
I could fly to your house....
Drawing a blank....

1:29 PM EST  
Blogger twinmomplusone said...

I'm sending the men's Olympic team over to your place, bet they're better at rubbing some cream than scoring some goals ;)

Like Dani's idea, have any granite at your place?

4:14 PM EST  
Blogger nancy said...

Well aren't you all such a bunch of hilarious hags. Very funny, but no fucking use at all. And most sad...no granite.

8:27 PM EST  
Blogger Isabella said...

Okay, you asked for it. You got it. Here is what you need. No charge for the finders fee! I actually can't believe this invention really exists, but I guess a lot of people are in the same boat :)



11:30 PM EST  
Blogger nancy said...

Oh Mel!! I am SOOOO tempted, how scary is that?

11:44 PM EST  
Anonymous andrea from the fishbowl said...

You need a boyfriend. :)
Or would a very loooooong vibrator suffice?

9:27 AM EST  
Blogger Uisce said...

I've got it. Are you ready for this? OK.

1. find a corner where two walls meet.

2. hang up some saran wrap at back height, covering the corner. secure with masking tape.

3. spread lotion all over the corner on the saran wrap.

4. remove clothing. (I'm not looking)

5. back up to the corner and wiggle (honestly I'm not just saying that for the visual it gives me) to apply the lotion to your back

6. whatever you'd like to do at this point is really up to you.

4:34 PM EST  
Anonymous kathy a said...

1] get a wooden spoon, or other non-sharp long-handled something.

2] put a paper towel or washcloth over it, and secure with a rubber band, hair-tie thingie, twist-tie, tape, whatever.

3] slather lotion on the towel; rub on back.

4] wash whatever you mean to use again.

5] use the $ you would have used for the super-back-lotion-applier for something else, something just to make you happy.


8:23 PM EST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In regards to your dilemma of applying lotion to your back. I saw this on the news "Beauty Trends" last week...

non-absorbent LOTION APPLICATOR makes it possible to INDEPENDENTLY APPLY to your own BACK and BODY


11:55 AM EDT  
Anonymous zions bank internet banking said...

Hey, you have a great blog here! I'm definitely going to bookmark you!
I have a zions bank internet banking site.
Come and check it out if you get time :-)

4:06 AM EDT  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home